


The Perfect Pair

by sobefarrington



Category: Breakout Kings
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-06
Updated: 2012-12-05
Packaged: 2017-11-20 10:50:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 17,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/584587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sobefarrington/pseuds/sobefarrington
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is basically the entire relationship between the two, From inception to conception so to speak.<br/>I was addicted to writing these two for a while.</p><p>M rating for the final chapter. Otherwise it's basically a G.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

Lloyd sat with his face buried by a journal written by a runner who’d had multiple personalities. It had been vaguely interesting to start, but he wasn’t paying much attention to it now. He’d made it through less than a quarter of the ramblings – more than enough to suffice a decent profile, but he was distracted – his mind preoccupied by the flaxen haired beauty hiding behind her computer.

He made sure not to stare, or the four other occupants in the room kept him from staring. Charlie, Ray, Erica and Shea didn’t know of his mildly obsessive affections for their teammate. Lloyd was petrified of the ramifications his adoration for Jules would inflect, so he kept his feelings to himself, returning his eyes to the journal when Julianne turned her head to adjust her scarf.

Lloyd loved the little insecurities that worked their way to her surface, like how she constantly adjusted her neckwear when she was anxious. What she considered flaws in herself made her impossibly beautiful, and he wanted nothing more than to let her know.

Lloyd thought about how different his life could be like if he had what his heart desired. To listen to her when she needed to talk, to hold her when she cried, to help her calm down when her anxieties took hold of her. Lloyd wanted to grow old with Julianne, have a family with her.

He pictured children with her hair and eyes and his awareness and intelligence. The most brilliant and beautiful children to grace the Earth with their presence. They’d be well read and spoken. They’d be well adjusted.

Their boys and girls would go to good schools, get good grades and go on to be lawyers and teachers and advocates for education and the environment. They’d make a difference.

They’d move to the Hamptons when they got on in years, enjoying their twilight with their grandbabies, having long Sundays with three generations of Lowerys cramped around the dinner table, the young ones talking loudly with food in their mouths, their parents hushing them to mind their manners. Lloyd would send Julianne a smile from across the table. She’d silently return it.

They’d move on from this world together. Well into their nineties, in their own home. Holding each other as they lay in bed, watching a storm break over the water from under the covers. They would go at precisely the same moment, so both could be spared the pain of losing the other. Their neighbor would discover them the next morning, to spare their children from having to find them.

That is, if he wasn’t currently serving twenty five years in Maybelle.

Lloyd let an audible sigh escape from his lungs as he returned to the journal in his hands.

 

Julianne had put the proverbial blinders on the minute the elevator doors opened. Ray and Charlie had returned from picking up the rest of the team at Maybelle Penitentiary. She wanted to keep herself in check during this case, and not let her mind wander to the events of the last one. Like her mind had been doing since the last one.

Julianne would be the first to admit that she had more issues than Time Magazine, and it wasn’t like she kept them secret. Everyone knew she had problems. The precise nature of her problems – and the sheer amount of them – that’s what she kept locked inside.

From almost everyone.

Lloyd knew. Not about everything, but about a lot of things. It had been harder to keep from him what she kept from Erica and Shea for two reasons. The first being that he used his special doctoring powers to read her and the second being the amount of time he had to do the first.

Lloyd was almost always left with Julianne at the base while the other four were out chasing the bad guys and following up on leads. They were often alone, giving him ample time to analyze her every movement, scrutinize her choice of words. And sometimes comment on the lack there of. 

At first it was troublesome. In the quiet moments they shared together, each doing the work they had in front of them, she could sense him wanting to say something, or she’d feel him staring at her. She became aware of how much she adjusted her scarf because Lloyd was taking notice of how many times she touched it. 

Soon after that his behavior changed. Lloyd started sitting closer to her, moving a table closer every case they worked on until he was sitting across from her. He spoke directly to her, and often. Before long she was telling him about where she went to school and why she wanted to be a Marshal and he was telling her about his time as a professor and about getting his doctorate. 

That was when he touched her. It was accidental and innocent, but she couldn’t keep from remembering it so clearly, the time Lloyd brushed his hand against hers. It was a Tuesday afternoon, and they’d been cooped up in the loft for hours. Charlie had just finished talking to their runner’s brother and the pair had been watching him leave when Lloyd turned around to go back to his books. His arm extended further than either had expected and the backs of his fingers breezed hers.

It was the slightest touch, but it was still more than she could handle, the shock of the sensation stalling her in her steps.

And he knew too. Lloyd stopped at the same time she had and adjusted his view by leaning to see if she was alright. She wasn’t.

Lloyd had asked her, without moving any closer to her than he already was. She came out of it just enough to tell him she was fine. She apologized for letting her phobias take over and managed to get back to her seat where she could overload her senses with case information until she forgot about Lloyd’s hand.

Later that night she realized that she had managed to survive a small amount of human contact. Julianne pondered it for a good portion of her sleep time, contemplating the events between her and Lloyd during the last few cases.

The next day when she arrived at the base she was confronted with butterflies of a demeanor she’d never experienced before. Usually, they filled her stomach and her lungs with heavy purpose, as though the fluttering was pushing down on her insides. But she found as the elevator doors opened and the gang walked through the butterflies that consumed her were light and airy, jumping up into her throat and threatening to fly out from her mouth. Her anxiety levels were up, but only slightly and never surpassing a level she couldn’t handle on her own. She buried herself at her desk near immediately. She’d spend the last few cases there. Huddled in front of the screen, basking in a plasma glow, fiddling with her scarf.

She hoped that he couldn’t read the affection that she felt radiating from her pores. It would be even more awkward than the brief contact they shared if he knew how much she cared for him. It didn’t matter that he was a convicted felon. She didn’t care that he was doing time. It wasn’t his fault he had an addiction that put him behind bars. She didn’t see him that way. She saw Lloyd for the caring genius that he was. The few flaws his character displayed only made her want him more.

Julianne looked up from her screen and fiddled with her scarf again, adjusting it slightly to the right and ruffling the end with her fingers while glancing around the   
room. Everyone seemed to be occupied with their tasks, including Lloyd.

She sighed quietly to herself before going back to her information gathering. There was just too much keeping him from her. He was leaps and bounds smarter than she, Julianne would never be near the same page as him when it came to intelligence – never mind the phobias and disorders she dragged around with her. And that was if she could find the courage to push past the phobias and disorders that kept her from telling him. 

Julianne resigned to getting her work done. Maybe later she’d be strong enough to at least say a ‘hello’ to him.


	2. Two

“But why me?”

Julianne didn’t think there was a word for what she felt. Some combination of flabbergasted, upset, overwhelmed, angry and sick. Flabupwhelgrick. That was what she was.

She held the phone close to her hear as Charlie’s voice waivered slightly. It was so minimal she barely noticed. Between her new feeling and Charlie’s half explanation,   
half outright refusal, she was lucky she was still standing.

“Because you’ve been deputized, legally you’re able to do this. I have to get home to Marisol before she bites my head off and Ray’s already here. There’s no one else.   
Someone has to do it.”

“Charlie, I just.. I mean I don’t think-“

“It’s an order Julianne. Just get down to the motel off highway six and keep an eye on Lloyd for the night. It can’t be that hard to babysit a thirty year old genius.”

Charlie hung up on her before he could hear her mumble a ‘then why don’t you do it’. Though she had to be honest with herself, she never would have said that if she   
knew he was still listening. She put the phone down and took a few minutes to breathe. Deep, lung-filled breaths. All she had to do was survive the night. That was,   
assuming, she survived the drive.

 

Once in a while her paranoia worked to her advantage. Julianne had a duffle bag in the trunk of her car. Two changes of clothes, a tooth and hair brush and other odds   
and ends necessities she might need if she ever had to flee town in a hurry. The bag had been packed for more than a year, though she checked it once a week and changed   
clothes out with the seasons. This was the first time it had come in handy.

 

The drive down highway six wasn’t a bad one if you weren’t saddled with more phobias that an encyclopedia. It was two lanes – one in each direction – and not busy   
enough to necessitate the need for passing people. The maximum limit was eighty. Most people took that as a suggestion, and had a tendency to push their vehicles to mock   
two when it was off season for police. Julianne did quite the opposite, letting her six year old Jetta cruse a little over fifty for the two hour long drive.

Which should have taken her forty minutes.

 

 

Julianne arrived at the motel just after the sun set. She’d yet to eat anything since breakfast, but now she couldn’t tell if her stomach was angry at her because it was   
hungry, or because it was upset. He continued to breathe as she parked next to Charlie’s black SUV.

She had intended to take a moment to try and gather what little calm she had remaining, but an abrupt knock on her window as she pulled the keys from the ignition.

Startled, Julianne jumped in her seat and Charlie backed up a foot.

He apologized instantly.  
“I didn’t mean to scare you. Sorry Jules.”

Charlie’s voice was muffled by the Jetta’s window glass. Charlie took a few more steps off to the side, giving her enough room to open the door, and she climbed out.

“I still don’t understand Charlie- Why do I have to watch Lloyd? Why can’t you do it?”

“I already said, I-“

“Why can’t I have Erica as my charge?”

It was unusual for Julianne to interrupt anyone, especially Charlie. But Charlie had his reasons. The main one being that he didn’t want Ray to know he was bailing on his   
night in with Lloyd, though he’d never say that to Julianne. Instead, he spoke his second reason, which was just as important.

“Erica would walk all over you, and probably escape in the process. Lloyd is… not as tough as Erica. He’s smart, but lacks action. And he’s a bit neurotic. You two are pretty   
much perfect for each other.” Charlie’s train of thought started to derail, and when he noticed he pushed it back on track. “He won’t try to escape under your watch, and he   
won’t hurt you. You’ll be safer with Lloyd than you would be with Erica.”

She was started to shy away into herself even more. He was probably right. Erica was very outspoken. An alleged murderer. She probably wouldn’t think twice of   
bumping Julianne off to get her way if she wanted it bad enough. Lloyd was a gambling addict. At worst he’d trade her away for lotto tickets. 

She let out an audible sigh which let Charlie know she was seeing his side of the argument. He let out a small smile before delving into the next thing he had to ask her.

“Also, I need a small favor.”

Like coming down to the motel and agreeing to stay the night with a convict wasn’t favor enough. She took a deep breath before asking what.

“I need to borrow your car. Legally I have to leave the truck for Ray. You know I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t an absolute emergency Jules. Please?”

Charlie’s pleading was unrequired. She took her bag from the trunk before handing Charlie her keys.

“I promise I’ll be back before morning. No one needs to know I’m gone.”

“Sure Charlie. Of course.”

Charlie went in to hug her, something he felt was appropriate given the amount of favors she was doing for him. A friendly one-armed hug to say thank you. He thought   
nothing of it, but Julianne froze, and stopped breathing.

“Thanks Jules. I owe you big time.”

He didn’t notice her freak out, but instead slid into the driver’s seat and started the diesel engine to life. Charlie peeled out of the gravel parking lot, spinning the tires a   
little. If he damaged her car in the slightest… well, she probably wouldn’t do anything about it.

 

After taking a moment to gather herself, she lifted her head and started off towards the room. She didn’t have to guess which one. She’d noticed Lloyd watching from the   
window when she pulled in.

She took her time walking the few steps to the door, stopping as she reached for the handle. She could hear Lloyd breathing on the other side. 

It wasn’t that she didn’t like him. It was quite the opposite. Julianne had grown to really enjoy Lloyd’s company at the base when the rest of the team was out chasing the   
bad guys. She grown accustomed to his unusual charm, his random way of making conversation from anything. She was never and always interested in what he had to say. 

It wasn’t that she was afraid to be alone with him. She had been almost every time they were called in on a case. But that had always been during the daylight hours, in   
the confines of a building she knew the exits of, in a city of millions. She was semi-comfortable at the loft. Now she was in a small town she’d never been to before, off the   
highway in the middle of nowhere. And the only person who knew she was here with a convict out on a day pass had fled. In her car.

“You could very well stay the night on the other side of the door if you like. I wouldn’t recommend it though. In this part of the country you tend to run into raccoons, coyotes,   
and the odd fox in lieu of cats and dogs. That’s not to mention the field mice that frequent airports like the one across from us-“

“I’m just—I’m trying Lloyd. Give me a minute. Please.”

“All the time in the world.”

There was silence between the two of them again, but it lasted only a moment.

“I promise I won’t bite you. I’m really quite gentle.”

Julianne smiled to herself. She knew he was a kind soul deep down. He knew she needed reassurance. Julianne turned the handle and let herself in.

She had started to feel better about the night.

Until she saw there was only one bed.


	3. Three

“Can I take your bag?”

Julianne stood deathly still just inside the doorway, leaving enough room for Lloyd to close it behind her. She didn’t move or speak. She was simply stuck.

Lloyd waited for an answer, cautiously watching her eyes as they remained glazed. He inched himself closer, leaning awkwardly to gently take the bag from her hands without spooking her. She released her grip on them when his fingers graced hers, the weight of the duffle being lifted from her grasp. It was then that she came back to the room. And then that Lloyd answered her unspoken question.

“It was the only room available. I insist you have the bed so there’s no point in arguing chivalry with me, though I know you wouldn’t anyway. The chair there will be more   
than enough for me. It’s twenty times more padded than the bunk I’m used to and I’m much more comfortable sleeping upright, what with all the naps I used to take in my   
office at the university. There’s dinner too. Charlie went overboard, spoiling us with Chinese from this little family place down the highway. He said he’d have to switch out   
with you – probably at the thought of spending more than ten minutes alone in a room with me – so there’s lots and would you please say something because this is getting   
really awkward for me.”

Julianne smiled as Lloyd rank his free hand over the back of his head, tugging slightly on his hair. He did that when he was nervous, though Julianne swore she wouldn’t   
let on that she noticed these things. Lloyd put her bag down on the foot of the bed and went back to fidgeting with his fingers as Julianne replied.

“There’s Chinese?”

 

The pair sat together on the bed, one on either side, leaning against the headboard eating from their take-away containers and watching America’s Most Wanted. Lloyd   
spent the time analyzing each criminal and predicting where they were likely to go when they escaped or where they were likely to be found if they were already in hiding. He   
made jokes all throughout, causing Julianne to almost choke on a piece of broccoli when he mentioned something about sex offenders and the back corners of libraries.

The local news was next, and after five minutes of gruesome street violence and photos of this week’s missing child, Julianne excused herself for the shower. She took   
her bag along with her and exited twenty minutes later, her damp hair tossed up with an orange butterfly clip. She offered it to Lloyd next, adding in that she saved him some   
hot water before he decided he would.

The motel had a tub.

And Lloyd was a man who appreciated a nice bath once in a while.

Fitting with the night’s entertainment, Nightmare On Elm Street started up after the local news. It was about a half an hour through when Lloyd released himself from the   
bathtub and rejoined Julianne in the main room. He found her sitting in the same spot on the bed – closest to the window – with her knees tucked into her chest and her   
hands over her eyes.

Lloyd rubbed the small towel against his head to dry his hair as he spoke.

“Are you alright?”

“I’ve never seen this before.” She answered in a simple, flat, muffled tone.

“And you’re still not seeing it.”

“It’s scary.”

Lloyd turned to the television to see what it was.

“Freddy? This is nothing. You should see the movie they made about the Zodiac killer. Why they show movies about serial killers that never got caught to prisoners I’ll never   
know. You could change the channel.”

“I know.”

Lloyd paused in thought. She’d contemplated that already and made a conscious decision not to. He walked over to the bed and reclaimed his spot next to her, keeping   
his distance as not to touch her. She uncovered her eyes to speak to him when she felt the bed dip under his weight and was surprised at what she’d seen.

Being that he didn’t have any other clothing to wear, Lloyd was wearing the jeans he’d had on earlier, but left the top button on the fly undone. He hadn’t put a shirt on,   
which Julianne was oddly grateful for. His abs were more defined that she’d imagined, and they glistened with mist from the steamed up bathroom. He was better built that   
his clothing gave him credit for. His four pack threatened to become a six with a few more work outs, but he had enough chub around his midsection that his belly squished   
around his navel. If Julianne was to build her perfect man, he’d look a lot like Lloyd.

She quickly stopped herself from staring.

“I was trying something new.” She whispered, as if she too had to hide from Freddy.

Lloyd liked the game she was playing and decided to go with it, leaning in and whispering back to her.

“And what game is that?”

“The game of Bravery.”

Lloyd smiled and indicated the scary part was over before asking her if she’d ever seen a scary movie.

“I saw Toy Story 3. That had me scared a few times.”

“Wow. Alright. No, this is a good step, and I’m glad you were able to take this step on your own. But,”

Lloyd took her hands in his and pried them from her face, against her will and wishes, as she begged him over the sounds of his own voice to let her have her hands   
back.

“Jules, I’m here for you. I can help you through this, this phobia of scary movies.”

Lloyd scooted closer to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. She noticed his closeness and was surprised how it didn’t bother her. It didn’t make her flinch or   
want to run away. In fact, she could feel her body wanting to curl into him, around him. She left herself fall a few inches closer and Lloyd wrapped his other arm around the   
small, flaxen haired beauty. He helped her relax her head to his chest and she listened to his heartbeat as she told him it wasn’t a fear of scary movies, rather a fear of being   
murdered by the thing in the scary movies.

He was listening. Or he felt like he was trying really hard to. It was near hopeless to hear her frightened whispering over the sound of his heart beating in his ears. She   
was intolerably close to him. Skin on skin close. Lloyd could feel his soul rise up and into his throat, joining his heart on a journey through his body.

“You know they aren’t real right?” he asked, gently touching his chin to the top of her head.

“Yes doctor, I know monsters aren’t real.” 

Lloyd chuckled at her joke and Julianne slid her arms around Lloyd, eternally comfortable in the situation she was now in.

Julianne cuddled into Lloyd’s warmth, relaxing enough to turn her head to the television again. The scary part had indeed ended.

“Let’s make tonight’s goal to just make it to the end of the movie.”

She silently agreed, nodding her head as much as she could while still keeping close to Lloyd. The screen turned dark once more and Julianne turned into him again,   
squishing her eyes closed tight. Lloyd’s heart began to take off all over again and Julianne tried not to let on that she heard it.

Lloyd rested a hand on her head, reassuring her somewhat with his gentle touch.

“Even if you don’t watch any of it.”


	4. Four

The movie ended about an hour later, with Julianne watching a combined total of seventeen minutes of it. But they didn’t turn it off. For that Lloyd was proud of her.

They traded one movie for another. The night’s horror flick merged into a sixties musical. 

Julianne felt slightly better about her place in the world, but she didn’t want to leave the comfort of the arms that held her. She sighed. She didn’t care for the movie   
either way, but she wasn’t going to say anything or make a move for the remote. If Lloyd didn’t like it he would change it.

Lloyd anticipated the release of his spirit as he anticipated the release of Julianne. He gave her enough space to move if she desired so, but her grip on him was still ever   
present. She moved her arm from across his bare stomach to rest her palm there, her thumb gently brushing over his navel once or twice. Perhaps she was still frightened. He   
looked to the television to distract himself. Though he wouldn’t admit it, he didn’t mind musicals. The bright colors, uncharacteristically jolly people. He didn’t hear Julianne   
object to the choice of entertainment, though he felt she wouldn’t say if she didn’t care for it either, but he decided to leave it on anyway.

It was slowly nearing tomorrow and neither of the pair were tired.

That wasn’t entirely true. Anytime Lloyd wasn’t in fear of being groped by his cell mate (or any other prisoner for that matter) he was tired. But with the company he   
currently kept he doubted he’d sleep at all that night. Even if he managed to move to the chair like he promised Charlie before he bailed.

Julianne was much the same way. She was physically exhausted from getting to the motel and emotionally drained from Charlie and Freddy. But all of that anxiously   
spent energy was cancelled out by her mental charge.

She had the capacity, once in a while, to compartmentalize the phobias and the irrationalities and focus. Those moments were few and far between, but they happened.   
And it was happening now.

It didn’t take long for her mind to pull questions to the curiosities she housed behind the fears and phobias. The things she was curious about far outweighed and   
outnumbered any issues she heralded. There were things she always wondered, about Lloyd and prison and such. And now that they were alone and he could answer them, it   
might be the time to ask.

“Lloyd?”

Her voice waivered, as she adjusted the placement of her fingers on his skin. He looked down to the top of her head. Her blond hair hiding the expression of puzzled   
guilt her showed. She continued to stare at her hands, never moving her head to look at him. She was able to ask it, but she still couldn’t bring herself to look at him when 

she did. Small steps, he thought.

“Yeah Jules?”

“Can I ask you something? Kind of personal?”

Lloyd touched her hand to get her attention, taking the one that played with his belly pudge and holding it as if he desired nothing else. She didn’t make a move to make   
eye contact and he was partially stalled. It must have been pretty big for her to ignore the efforts he was making. Best be serious.

“You can always ask me anything Jules. Anything at all.”

She smiled, knowing his kindness was sincere, so she asked him.

“What is prison like?”

Lloyd was appreciative of her decision to not look to him when she asked. He took his turn as gazing away, looking back to the people dancing in full skirts and sun   
umbrellas as he thought.

Julianne was starting to think twice about asking when Lloyd piped up.

“You want the truth?”

She pondered her question once more before deciding. A simple nod against his skin was all Lloyd needed.

“It’s the worst thing. The most impossibly terrible thing you could imagine. Having all your rights stripped of you, having everything you own taken away, everything you are. 

You’re so utterly alone and naked – not, not physically nude, but just bare. You spend all your time living with a constant fear. If you’re not running the place, you’ve got   
nothing. It’s like life. You enter it naked, scared, alone and with nothing. And you spend your life doing everything and anything you can to save your ass from being   
pounded.”

Julianne could feel his lungs expand with sharp intakes and contract in bursts. He spoke a little louder than he might have otherwise, and at a quickened pace. She knew   
this from her own personal struggles and unconsciously took on his emotion, stroking his stomach again with her thumb.

Lloyd winced at the thoughts that came flooding into his memory. Things that had happened, things that were threatened to happen, situations he somehow managed to   
avoid. He felt himself start to tear up, the water welling. He wiped some away as Julianne tenderly reached for his hand again.

 

She could feel his hesitation, and she didn’t want him to continue if it hurt him to. But just the same, he had been there for her when she needed it, and it seemed like he   
needed her now. She ran her fingers across the back of his hand before intertwining their digits and resting their combined hand in a slightly tented manner over the pudgy   
patch of his belly. Julianne closed her eyes and took a long, relaxed, deep breath. 

Lloyd had never known the comfort of another person. He’d grown up without a father, his mother raising him with an outstretched hand. She wasn’t really the ‘huggy’   
type, though she did love him. They had a mutual need for each other, until Lloyd was busted and locked up. Then she wanted nothing more to do with him.

This feel he picked up from being with Julianne was something he’d never felt before. It was an calm so serene he couldn’t place it. He fought for the words to express   
what it was, but they never came. He was at peace, for the first time since college. His heart raced to keep up with his mind, and his soul soared to test the limits of the newly   
discovered sky.

“It’s been easier, since Maybelle. I’ve got Shea in my corner. I value the friendship he’s given- well, I call it friendship. I don’t think he sees it that way.”

Again he was silent as he thought, taking the time to find the right words to describe his feelings and experiences.

“It’s still hard there. Cons are pretty much all alike once they’ve been inside a while. Hard. Cold. They’re all just looking to make it easier for themselves while they’re there. Do   
what’s best for yourself, you know? Whatever you have to do to get by.”

Tears were numbering the many as he went on. Julianne felt a hiccup in his chest. It was infinitesimal and would have gone unnoticed if she wasn’t resting her head on   
his chest. If something had happened to cause such an intense reaction he didn’t tell her specifics. She wasn’t sure she was ready for that kind of confession either.

Lloyd took his hand back to clear his face of the water works show he was putting on. Julianne felt terrible for making him upset. She fiddled with her scarf some more as   
she contemplated telling him some of her story.

“I have a panic attack every morning at the thought of going to work.”

She blurted it out softly, but quick, so she was unable to take it back once it was said.

“At the thought of working with criminals?” he wondered aloud.

“The idea of driving myself through rush hour traffic and having to interact with people all day long gets me worked up. I can’t … speaking is… sometimes…”

She had tried just a little too much for one night. Her breathing became labored and she had to fight for oxygen. She was bringing on an attack at the thought of it   
again.

“Jules?”

This panic attack had been worse than the one or two small ones he’d been witness to previous. He tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear and leaned to get a better   
look at her face. Her skin was pale and her expression was blank.

“C’mon JuJube. You’re safe. You’re inside. I’m here Jules. I’m here.”

Lloyd helped to calm her by rubbing small circles over her back, soothing her with his touch, his words echoing into her soul. His kissed the crown of her head several   
times, though most of the first few she didn’t even notice. In time her breathing returned to mimicking his own, the pair in sync with one another.

Lloyd calmed when she did, the two relaxing into a small silence.

A silence that was comforting, until it bordered on awkward, pushing into terrifying after five whole minutes.

“Jules?”

She was still breathing, but the pace was consistently steady and somewhat slowed. Julianne was still wrapped around him, her hand resting on his stomach with her   
thumb nesting over his navel. She was quite content. Lulled into such a calm after her attack by Lloyd that she’d fallen asleep in his arms.


	5. Five

Lloyd watched as the musical turned into a rerun of America’s Funniest Home Videos, which turned into the color bar test pattern, which turned into snow. He let it run without the sound, giving him enough light to watch Julianne sleep in his arms after he turned the one bedside lamp off. 

She wore a pair of loose fitting black yoga pants, making it obvious that she didn’t practice the art, but preferred them because they were comfortable. Shame really,   
yoga might have helped to calm her some. 

The oversized sweatshirt she covered herself with had the letters NYU silk screened across the front, but years of wearing had them faded into near obscurity. She must   
have favored it to anything else.

The fact that she kept her scarf on spoke volumes to Lloyd. She really did see it as her security blanket. As comfortable as she was left alone in a motel room with a   
convict out on a day pass, she still needed her security. He smiled once more, studying the orange clip in her hair as he thought.

Lloyd let his mind imagine a scenario where this night would be so much more than it currently was.

Lloyd and Julianne would have been together for just over a year. He would be working part time with the Marshal’s and he would still have tenure at the university. It   
would be their first real vacation together, because she didn’t think visiting his mother over Christmas counted. He would have had an easy time getting away from work, but   
Charlie would have hassled Jules about the two weeks away. She was a major asset to the team and he hated losing her for any amount of time.

The motel would have been a short, overnight stop on their drive to the mountains. They wouldn’t have been stopped in this bum town, but a similar bum town miles out   
of the city. States over. But location was easily overlooked.

They would have been meeting her family up there. Mother, father, brothers and sisters if she had any. A sky trip, so she’d have occasion to wear her scarf.

They’d sky during the day and drink hot chocolate by the fire at night. He’d entertain her family with stories of the university and they’d laugh along with him. Not at him.

Once it was time to retire for the night he’d have her to himself. She’d want him almost as badly as he wanted her. And she’d be waiting for him once he was out of the   
bath. The sex would be wild and passionate, and require another shower once they were spent, but Julianne would fall asleep in his arms before they could bother to move to   
the bathroom. He’d watch her as she snoozed until he fell under the same spell of the sandman.

The next day would be much the same, except his nerves would be shot all to hell. And his plan for the day would join his nerves fairly quickly.

Jules would insist on trying one of the two black diamond runs the lodge had to offer and then fall part way down the slope. She wouldn’t be badly hurt, but her leg   
would be bruised and sore. Lloyd would help her down the rest of the mountain and into the lounge.

She’d tell him she wasn’t up to the quiet dinner they had planned a few hours beforehand and he’d start to sweat. It would take some convincing but eventually she’d   
give in. Julianne wouldn’t want to disappoint or upset him.

Lloyd would be nervous but keep his cool. The food would be amazing and Jules would be pleased she went after all.

Dessert would arrive after the main course. A double chocolate cupcake – her favorite – and she’d be shocked wordless when the waiter brought it.

The cherry that usually garnished the top would have been replaced with a medium sized diamond ring. The square cut gem would be set in a white gold band and it   
would fit her finger perfectly.

Lloyd would get down on one knee and she would cry. She’d say yes with tears in her eyes – barely able to speak the words – and the entire restaurant would erupt with   
applause. Her phobias buried so deep she forgot about them entirely.

The sex that night would be twice as wild and ten times as passionate. She’d tell him how happy she was and that as long as she had him she’d need for nothing else.   
She wouldn’t know it, but he’d cry then. It was exactly how he felt about her.

They’d tell her family in the morning over breakfast before they left to drive home. Of course they’d be thrilled, hugging Jules and then him in turn. Her parents would   
love him as much as his mother tolerated her. They’d know without speaking it to one another that telling Agnes would wait until they absolutely had to.

The drive home would be twice as nice as the drive there, and they’d stop at that same motel they stayed the night in on the way back. Already a fond distant memory.   
They wouldn’t know it then but they’d be starting a tradition. They’d take trips to the Rockies often, and they’d make sure to stay at that motel every time.

And every trip, every night in that motel, she’d sleep soundly in his arms while he stayed awake and watched her. She’d wear the yoga pants, the old NYU sweatshirt and   
the orange clip, but she’d only wear the scarf when it was cold out. Never to bed.

 

Lloyd was gazing out the window as the sun started to rise. He hadn’t realized that morning was breaking, but it had. The sun, bright and orange, had broken the   
horizon, leaving a gentle glow in its wake. Breaking Lloyd’s heart in the process. It wouldn’t be long before Julianne’s Jetta reclaimed its spot next to the SUV and she swapped   
out for Charlie once again. 

He heard tires rolling before he could finish his thought. The crunching of gravel under rubber as a Jetta pulling into the spot it once owned and a man who looked   
exactly like Charlie got out.


	6. Six

Lloyd’s heart threatened to burst out of his ribcage. Time had flown by faster than he’d imagined possible. It was dawn and his time with Julianne was running out fast.

He watched Charlie from the small picture window. The thin curtains were drawn closed, but were perfectly see through. Lloyd watched with heavy anticipation as Charlie   
locked the Jetta up and headed for the door.

He took a look down at the woman who rested with him. Julianne had fidgeted a few times through the night, adjusting herself into more comfortable positions until she   
was resting her head on Lloyd’s lap and had maneuvered her left foot to the other side of his right one. Before Charlie left Lloyd had promised him that exactly this wouldn’t   
happen. Lloyd had suspected Charlie might have been aware of his feelings for Julianne but he never spoke it. Now he was going to know for certain that Lloyd had a thing for   
the flaxen haired beauty who was supposed to be babysitting him. And worse yet, Charlie might think she had feelings for him too.

Lloyd ran through a hundred scenarios in his head, how all of this could play out based on Charlie’s initial reactions. His head beat faster and faster, but Lloyd was   
undecided if it was because of Charlie’s impending arrival into the scene or knowing that his time in his fantasy was nearly over.

 

Charlie opened the door and walked in. He stepped silently and closed the door with a soft click, trying to respect the sleeping occupants as he crept back in. He started   
to whisper as he turned around.

“Hey, is anyone aWAKE!?”

Charlie’s initial reaction was shock, followed swiftly by anger. Lloyd had broken his word, and who knows what else he did to get Jules so close to him. It looked as   
though he’d drugged the girl and staged the scene, playing out some weird, mental fantasy.

Lloyd had deduced his best reaction to be to calm Charlie and explain the situation as quick and briefly as he could. Getting the truth out as fast as possible would help   
Charlie see the scene for what it was, and not what Lloyd wanted it to be.

But he pleaded instead.

“Please, please Charlie. This isn’t what you think. But please give me five more minutes. Just until the sun comes up. Please. Five minutes.”

Lloyd’s hands were waiving about, as if keeping Charlie at bay. The pair both moved and spoke in a loud whisper, trying to yell at each other without waking Julianne.

“You promised me Lloyd. You were going to sleep on the fucking chair! What the fucking fuck happened here? What did you do to her Lloyd?”

“Nothing! Nothing I swear. She’s fine. She’s perfect. Just, please Charlie I’m begging you. Five minutes.”

“No fucking way. I’m not leaving-“

“I’ll tell Ray. I’ll tell Ray you bailed on your Con-Sitting duties and bullied Jules into coming down here to do it for you.”

Charlie stopped suddenly in his spot. He wanted to curse Lloyd out a little more, but he knew where the genius was going. If Lloyd told Ray that Charlie bailed and got   
Jules to cover Ray would be pissed, and cite some code violation. Never mind the fact that Charlie had lost the toss and was stuck with the nut job. He bailed on his turn to   
watch him. Ray wouldn’t forgive him for that, let alone making Julianne do his job for him. Charlie would never hear the end of it.

“Five minutes. And you do this job for free. No time is coming off your sentence.”

“Okay. Okay.”

Charlie took a good look at Jules. She was still breathing, and she looked at peace. She’d be fine for another five minutes. Charlie stepped outside the door, slamming it   
closed as he left to stand guard.

Julianne stirred once more, wrapping herself tighter to Lloyd in the process. He shushed her, hunching over to kiss her temple before he started to rub her back again. 

She lulled back into a restful sleep, releasing a soft groan in the process. She’d be up soon anyway, Lloyd thought to himself. He didn’t want her to be outnumbered   
when she did open her eyes.

It broke his heart to pieces, a tear scrolling down his cheek. Lloyd ran his hand back and forth along Julianne’s arm in a soft, gentle motion. She hugged his leg in   
response.

“JuJube… time to wake up.”


	7. Seven

Julianne stirred at the gentle loving touch Lloyd gave her. She stretched her legs out, unwinding them from his as she opened her eyes.

She’d forgotten where she was, waking from her dream state to find herself comfortably wrapped around someone she barely knew. Julianne instantly became a deer in   
headlights, freezing in the position she was in as her breathing started to quicken, her head still resting on Lloyd’s lap. 

He was quick to act, giving her what he knew she needed from him at that moment. Reassurance.

“Hey Jules. You’re alright, I promise. You’re safe. You had a panic attack and then you fell asleep. I didn’t want to risk waking you. I’m sorry. You’re safe, I swear it.”

Julianne blinked a few times, letting her eyes fall back into focus. She did remember the motel room, the horror movie, talking to Lloyd and having the panic attack. 

Her eyes shot wide again as she bolted upright.

“I had an attack?”

“Last night, yeah. It’s okay Jules, don’t be embarrassed.” Lloyd watched as she flung her face into her hands, trying to hide. “I won’t say anything.”

He stopped to let her speak, but Julianne kept silent.

“You gonna be okay?”

She nodded without removing her hands. Lloyd would have to break the news to her sometime. He wanted to lie to her, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

“Charlie’s outside too, by the way. He came in here. Saw us-You. Me. Sorry. Again.”

Julianne muffled an OhMyGod through her hands. Lloyd heard her hiccup as she started to sob. As if that weren’t enough there was a knock at the door. A forceful,   
demanding knock, as if Charlie were banging on the outside asking permission to enter and angry about it.

“Your bag is still in the bathroom. You could-“

Lloyd didn’t have to finish his sentence. Julianne wasted no time. She climbed right over him and rushed into the bathroom, slamming the door after she entered. Charlie   
took that as his cue to enter as Lloyd hung his head. The click of the bathroom door locking ended Lloyd’s night with Julianne. Charlie spoke, everything happening in a span   
of five seconds.

“Is she okay?” he asked in a demanding tone.

“She will be. She’s just upset.”

Charlie looked to the bathroom door with a forceful determination. He looked back to Lloyd who was still in his jeans and lacked a shirt. Dark circles were beginning to   
show their appearance. Charlie placed the keys to Julianne’s Jetta on the side table by the door and took a seat in the chair Lloyd had promised he’d sleep in. It was obvious to   
Charlie that Lloyd hadn’t slept at all. He wondered what exactly had gone on.

But before he could ask Julianne exited the bathroom. She was dressed and prepared for another day of work, wearing a clean pair of jeans, and white tank and the   
jacket she had worn the day before. Her scarf was wrapped tightly around her neck, making sure she didn’t expose any vulnerable skin. She stopped as she crossed into the   
room, averting her eyes.

Charlie stood as Julianne tried to make a break for her keys and the door. Lloyd watched the scene as each of them tried to step out of each other’s direction, only to get   
into each other’s way.

If it had been any other pair, Lloyd would have laughed.

Finally Charlie succeeded and let Julianne pass. She mumbled something about being back at the office within the hour. She swiped her keys from the table and bolted   
from the room. Lloyd and Charlie watched as she got into her car and drove off. 

Charlie saw her take off at a normal speed, but Lloyd knew it was her version of erratic driving. She couldn’t get out of there fast enough.

Charlie turned to Lloyd, who was now upset. He told the con to get dressed and be ready in five. He was going to wake up Ray and Erica.

Lloyd sighed as Charlie left the room again.

He was alone in a room he once shared with the only woman he’d ever love. He sighed to himself and dressed for the day, knowing he’d be back behind bars with no   
time off his sentence before sundown.


	8. Eight

Julianne could see them from her desk. Lloyd and Erica. They’d spent the better part of the day whispering secrets to each other. At first she tried to ignore it, and how it was oddly paired with the butterflies in her stomach. Jules watched Lloyd torture himself with making a decision. It had been easier for Erica. With her daughter in the mix the decision was already made for her. Lloyd had his mother to think about, or rather, he had to think about if he had his mother to think about. He said he hated her. Several times that Julianne could recall, to which he’d follow up with a phone call to her. Lloyd loved his mother. Not all the time, but he did.

Shea was on the outs with Ray and Charlie, all but confined to the interrogation room. Whatever it was he was trying to do to help the team wasn’t getting them anywhere.   
Though Ray and Charlie were toying with the idea of Shea being a double agent, Julianne knew it wasn’t true. She didn’t have proof, but what she lacked in evidence she made up for in certainty. She knew Shea wouldn’t do a thing to jeopardize his time earned. She also knew that Lloyd and Erica didn’t want to give up their early freedom. 

The problem was that she was the only one who knew. Erica was prepared to run if it really looked like Shea was going to blow it for them. She was just trying to convince Lloyd of it.

Julianne had decided to interrupt their conversation by entering the small kitchen, masking her real intentions by holding her empty coffee cup in her hands. 

The whispering ceased instantly and Erica walked out, trying to hide her conspiracy with a small smile to her civilian co-worker. Lloyd remained, staring at the air between himself and a space on the floor five feet in front of him. 

“Lloyd?” she finally bucked up the courage to ask him, her voice shaking at the anticipation of his response.

He kept his back to her, forcing himself not to cry. It wasn’t his mother he was worried about living without. But he’d never bring himself to tell her.

Lloyd stood up straight, turned and pushed right past Julianne, never actually touching her, but not looking her in the eye either. He couldn’t bear to. 

Lloyd mumbled a ‘Not right now’ to his co-worker and didn’t look back. There was still work to be done if they were going to catch Carmen. Or not catch Carmen. 

Lloyd wasn’t sure what they were doing anymore.


	9. Nine

Lloyd couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Freedom.

And true freedom, not the half-free-work-release bullshit, but very real, one hundred percent freedom.

He thought about it to himself as he spoke to the ladies in the strip club. When he first heard where they were going he was excited. He let himself be, writing it off as a perfectly natural response when a man was told he’d soon be surrounded by half dressed women. But he found when he got there that wasn’t the case.

All of the ladies were distraught and confused, both certain and unsure of what they’d seen. Lloyd felt for those girls. And as soon as the one started to adjust the flowing lace top she hardly wore with nervousness, he thought of Julianne.

Julianne. How would Lloyd live without her? Of he ran, IF he ran, how would he manage? Jules was a nice girl, a good girl. He knew for certain that she wouldn’t run with him. Even if she felt the same way about him, her phobias and other issues would keep her from making that leap. Then she’d be left behind, with Ray and Charlie, to track them down and return them to maximum security for a fifty year stretch. He knew he wouldn’t last a day back at Rahway. The inmates would eat him alive, so to speak. He’d be dead by morning. Thought death was a much better outcome than the torture he would suffer if he lived out his sentence. He wondered what would be worse, the agony of death after recapture or living his life without her.

Lloyd had a hard time waiting in between calls to see her, let alone an eternity. The image of her was etched in his memory, and it was barely enough to get by as it were.   
Bits of her were catalogued in his mind. The way she smelled alternately of lavender and honey, how her hair would flow around her face and over her scarf on days when she just couldn’t bring herself to confront the world, how she’d speak to him with a softer kindness when no one else was around. Julianne cared for her coworkers, even the convicted ones. She’d absolutely be upset if she had to track any of her new found friends down and return them to prison permanently. She saw the good in all of them. How could Lloyd take that away from her?

He listened to the young lady speak, her voice quaking in a way that was all too familiar. Lloyd decided he’d leave making a decision until later, when he could be confident in his resolution. He would do whatever was best for him when the moment arose. If he could stand to.


	10. Ten

Julianne watched as Lloyd and Erica took sanctuary in the bathroom. She’d noticed them throughout the day, conversing and cavorting. Every time they spoke it was in   
hushed tones and shady glances. Jules could tell Lloyd was struggling with the decision. Fight or Flight. He was having a terribly hard time making up his mind. It seemed as   
though he was arguing with himself. Heart versus Head. Had she the nerve to ask him, she’d of found out she was right.

Erica, on the other hand, was finding it easy to be his polar opposite. She seemed to be having no second thoughts at all. If Julianne was reading her right, Erica’s face and their expressions conveyed absolute certainty. She had decided to run, whatever consequences that followed she’d deal with as they came. She was strong and determined two characteristics Lloyd lacked in spades. Julianne knew that he could be, somewhere inside him he had the will to be strong and the smarts to be determined. Jules just had to find the hope in herself that he didn’t discover those traits. A feat that was failing her and him both when Erica captured Lloyd in the bathroom.

It wouldn’t be long before the dark haired beauty had Lloyd convinced that running was the best case scenario. She couldn’t have that. Julianne wasn’t going to give Lloyd   
the chance.

Completely against character, Julianne bolted from her chair, charging towards the bathroom. She made sure no one was looking, and she let herself in.

It was obvious they had been talking, the pair of them creating some distance and becoming instantly silent. Lloyd started washing his hands as Julianne closed the door   
behind her.

“Don’t do it. Don’t run.” She practically begged, pleading with the both of them.

She gave it her best effort, without seeming desperate. Erica made a face, obviously angry that their plan had been found out and even more upset that Julianne thought   
she could talk her out of it. Erica crossed her arms and turned her head, ignoring the words Jules spoke. But Lloyd was different.

He hung his head a little, almost embarrassed that he even considered running a viable option. Julianne lightened up, trailing off before coming to a halt entirely. She left   
the bathroom after apologizing for barging in, a little ashamed of herself for doing so.

 

But Lloyd was glad she had. Julianne’s bold confrontation cemented in his mind his answer. There was no way he was going to leave her. He couldn’t. Lloyd knew at the   
moment she entered the bathroom he wouldn’t ever be able to put her in a position of having to find him. He would never escape and risk never seeing her again, or only   
seeing her as he was on his way back to Rahway, and impending death. He’d never do anything that jeopardized the time he got to spend with her.

Lloyd would spend the rest of his life in minimum security, putting in his days and waiting for the call from Charlie to lend a hand. He’d cherish the few days he was   
allowed to spend with Julianne and the team and earn his freedom. He’d keep chipping away at the calendar in the hopes that one day he’d be free and able to spend every   
second of his life with the love that filled it.

If she’d let him.


	11. Eleven

Julianne wasn’t sure what she’d gotten herself into. Her palms were sweating so badly that the steering wheel in front of her was lathered with wetness, the stinky, salty pore juice dripping from the leather wrapped wheel. And the wet steering wheel wasn’t helping her situation any.

She was regretting letting Charlie deputize her just over a year ago. Since then he’d been using it to his advantage far more than Julianne thought he would. Which is exactly why she was pulled over on the highway trying to calm herself in the Marshall’s Chevy Suburban while on her way to pick up Lloyd. 

She’d let Ray convince her to pick up the one lone convict from Maybelle. Julianne was pretty confident that if Shea was also in on this case she would be safe and secure behind her desk at the office, but since he was out with a broken foot he’d decided to stay behind. It made sense for their cover story, and Julianne wasn’t one to question anyone else’s decisions. She listened to Ray tell her Charlie was running late and didn’t defend herself when he claimed, as Charlie once had, that picking up Erica was out of the question. Julianne tried to convince Ray he could retrieve both Erica and Lloyd from their respective holding cells and get back before Charlie arrived, but that plan only backfired on her. Even she knew it was unlikely.

But the entire scenario would have been ten times less stressful if she’d been allowed to take her own vehicle. It was the heart of winter in New York City and Julianne had never driven another vehicle during the cold season. Ray spoke about criminal transport rules when she told him so and insisted her 2005 Jetta didn’t meet the standards that were required. Julianne had half a mind to believe Ray was bullshitting her, but she couldn’t be certain, so she nodded and took the keys to the Suburban.

She hadn’t realized how much bigger the Chevy really was compared to her VW. There was more room in the front seat that she would ever need, and because so it took her twice as long to set the seat and the mirrors into a position she was somewhat comfortable with.

Normally, the more space Julianne had, the more at ease she was, but she’d found with driving it was quite the opposite. The bigger the vehicle, the more anxious and terrified she became. She’d not driven anything aside from her Jetta for two years, and never anything bigger than her mother’s Ford station wagon. The Suburban felt like a bus. Sitting in it made it difficult for her to breathe. 

Julianne convinced herself that she was doing this to help Lloyd before she dared to start the beast. The engine roared to life as she repeated her mantra. Over and over. For Lloyd, For Lloyd. To help him get his life back. She had to drive to Maybelle. She had to pick him up from prison. She had to drive him back. She had to get him closer to parole. If she could help another person in such a drastic way, wasn’t it her duty to?

That train of thought managed to get her half way there. Her palms had started to sweat and then there was no controlling it. She pulled off the highway and onto the shoulder, right beneath an Emergency Parking Only sign.

Once she managed to calm herself down and get back on the highway she was fine, or as fine as she could be. She would make it to Maybelle. She would. And she did. Some two hours later.

Charlie and Ray were bound to stop asking her to pick people up and meet them places if she was always hours late.

Julianne didn’t need to see that the guards were upset and angry. Anyone left waiting for hours with no explanation would be furious. She pulled the Suburban around to the entrance as the guard unlocked the main door and exited the building. Julianne unlocked the doors in time with the guards and the biggest of the three uniformed men opened the back seat on the passenger side.

Lloyd started to rant instantly, before the door had opened completely. His voice was muffled by the glass and metal that separated them to start, but picked up in volume and speed once the door was ajar. He didn’t look to the front seat.

“Fuck Charlie, I’ve been waiting in there with these fine gentlemen,” Lloyd referred to the guard, looking the burly man in the eyes. “for two hours and eighteen minutes. Were   
you trying to play Ray another round of Rock Paper Scissors to get out of riding the half hour from Maybelle with me? Because, honestly, that’s really petty and unprofessional and does absolutely nothing for my self esteem.”

“I agree.”

Lloyd grumbled an ‘oh shit’ under his breath as the guard buckled him into his seat. The guard grinned to himself, letting Lloyd notice and making him feel worse about yelling at Jules. Lloyd wanted to smack the guard but he knew he’d regret it later. Also, his hands were cuffed behind his back.

“Prisoner’s secured ma’am. DuChamp has the key to unlock the cuffs. Good luck with this one.”

The guard slammed the door shut as Lloyd leaned towards him, his seatbelt restraining him before the door slammed into his face. He screamed out after him, all in the same instant.

“Thanks Jeff. That’s the last time I help you understand your son!!!”

Lloyd had to forehead pressed to the window as he watched Jeff laugh and wave at him. He closed his eyes against his will and pulled himself from the new hole he’d managed to dig for himself. 

Julianne took a deep breath in and began to lurch the Suburban forward. She’d have to remain calm with Lloyd in the vehicle, even though the new found tension between them made it impossible. 

Lloyd wanted to reach out to her and apologize, but the cuffs restrained both his hands and his voice. Julianne wanted to break the silence, but could find the words to. 

So she drove in silence.

As the snow started to fall….


	12. Twelve

“Are you alright?”

Julianne was in the middle of one of the worst panic attacks she’d had in recent memory.

The snow had started out falling sporadically, light and fluffy and washing away in the wind. Like spent dandelions drifting with the breeze once you’d picked and blown them. It still poked at Julianne’s nerves though, and Lloyd could see it. He offered her another route that Ray liked to take, one that eliminated the highway altogether. She’d not driven that path, but it seemed a good idea. She could feel the air in her lungs grow painfully thick with every intake, the attack setting in and finding its place. She took the exit Lloyd mentioned and reminded herself to breath deep. They still had quite the drive ahead.

Lloyd was quiet, keeping to himself while keeping an eye on Jules. Julianne was focused entirely on the road and the snow that was now tumbling down.

It refused to stop. The snow that is. It wasn’t more than moments after she changed routes that the flakes changed as well. They morphed from light and airy flakes to sheets of thick packing snow. The kind of stuff that makes for a great Snow Day. Julianne felt the panic grip her tight as her hands locked to the wheel. Her knuckles were whiter than a Christmas ghost. She did all she could to remain focused as Mother Nature pounded down on the Suburban. Lloyd made an effort too, reassuring her once or twice that she was capable of anything, though never speaking long enough to distract her from her concentration. She mentioned that she was fine, which was obviously a lie, but Lloyd went with it, sitting back silently as Julianne tried her hardest to combat her issues and the weather simultaneously. 

“Are you?” she asked back, breathing heavily but physically no worse for wear.

The storm picked up in pace and density until it appeared to stop falling and seemed to simply exist all around them. Julianne’s driving went from dreadfully slow to damn near stopped. The headlights reflected back off the white into the truck, giving the cab an eerie golden yellow glow. 

The new illumination was lost on Julianne but not Lloyd. He watched as it lit her face in a soft brilliance, bouncing off her hair where it ought to of and making her look even more amazing that she already did. Lloyd was brought out of his trance as the light became brighter, as if hitting something more solid than the wall of snow before bouncing back to them. 

Julianne turned the wheel to the right just a smidge, enough to give the other vehicle all the clearance it could need as it barreled down the other side of the street.

Whether the large transport saw them or not Julianne couldn’t decide. It had no intention of slowing down and made no effort to as it passed by them, shooting slush and snow at them in a cascade. 

The new wall came flying down on them, giving the panic in Julianne’s chest time to take a good grip and rip her from the concentration she’d been trying so hard to hold. She swerved the SUV to the right, trying to avoid as much of the snow as she could. It did more damage than good, as she hit a patch of slick road and lost control of the vehicle, steering it toward the ditch and bringing it to rest as it clipped a hydro pole.

The airbags in the vehicle deployed, pushing Julianne around a little more in the driver’s seat and keeping Lloyd from resting against the door. The truck came to a rest, wedged with its back end in the ditch and its left headlight against the pole.

“Julianne,” Lloyd’s voice was calm and reassuring, as always. “You’re stronger than it is.”

Julianne rushed to release her seatbelt, fighting the airbag for room to breathe. She found the latch to push the seat back, letting it slide all the way back, giving her as much room as possible. She was free of restraints, but still having trouble finding the air. Julianne let her head fall between her legs as she searched for the oxygen.

Lloyd struggled in his seat. He twisted and turned until his hands found the seatbelt button. He clicked himself free and managed to move to his feet, crouching, hobbling closer to her. He wanted nothing more than to hold her, touch her, reassure her that she was alright, and that the situation wasn’t one they couldn’t work their way out of. He knew she was feeling overwhelmed. He also knew that words wouldn’t be enough to help her. She needed more connection and he needed to find a way to give that to her.


	13. Thirteen

Lloyd moved his way to the seat across from him and behind her before attempting to maneuver the center console. He sat on the armrest, bringing his legs up over his head and spinning on his back to face the passenger seat. Had Julianne been sitting up he would have kicked her in the face and effectively killed himself. He placed his feet down on the seat and slid himself into it. A marvelous feat by his standards, even if he was the only one that had seen it. Lloyd sat and turned to face Julianne, who was still hunched over.

“Jujube, look at me. Please?”

His voice was smooth and understated, almost melting. His words practically hugged her, bringing her out of the headspace she was in, allowing her to sit upright.

He didn’t call her Jujube often, but it always got to her when he did.

Julianne felt the squeezing in her chest lighten up, allowing her to breath better. She was still too far gone to speak, but she was slowing coming back.

Lloyd wanted to reach out to her, take her hand, but his were still behind his back. He’d have to find a different way of getting to her. She looked up at him and he grabbed her eyes with his. Locked together in a visual embrace.

“Are you hurt.” He asked directly, without implying that she might be.

Julianne took a moment before slowing shaking her head. She wasn’t hurt, she knew that much, but there was something wrong.

“Breathe deep.”

She did. 

“Hurts.” She managed. “To breathe. Hurts.”

Julianne reached up for him, putting her hand on his shoulder to brace herself, as if she were able to transfer the pain. It didn’t help the pain any, but it soothed her soul   
to touch him.

 

“I need you to turn the engine off.”

She did, reaching out and taking the keys from the ignition.

“Good job. Cell phone?”


	14. Fourteen

Ray was worried. It was generally against his nature to be worried, but this situation wasn’t entirely natural.

“They shoulda been back by now Charlie.” Ray spoke harshly, echoing a feeling Charlie had been having the past hour.

“I know.”

Charlie’s solemn reply did nothing to calm Ray’s nerves.

“Even with Jules’ driving.”

Charlie closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead, repeating himself for no one’s benefit. 

Yes, Julianne had been gone for almost five hours without even a phone call from her as to why. Ray expected the drive to take her longer than it would him, but not this long.

Never this long.

Ray made for his jacket, pulling it off the back of a chair while taking the keys to Charlie’s truck off the desk.

“I’m taking your truck.” Was all Ray said as he left the building.


	15. Fifteen

Lloyd had been counting the minutes to keep time, but lost count what he guessed was an hour ago. He’d made it to forty two. That was when she kissed him.

Julianne’s panic attack had taken control and held her hostage for nearly half an hour. Lloyd managed to swing himself around and into the front seat to turn the engine off and free his companion from the confines of her seat.

Lloyd contorted his hands and body to unlatch Julianne’s seatbelt. He convinced her to push her seat back as far as it would go, but she was still being held into position by the previously deployed airbag. He tried to calm her down, speaking easily and clearly, but his soothing voice wasn’t living up to previous. Julianne continued to gasp for air, the pain ripping through her chest until it became unbearable. 

He wasn’t sure why, and figured he’d probably never know, but Julianne propelled herself forward in a panic at him, knocking Lloyd over and back into the back seat. Julianne landed atop him, her eyes a startled brown, desperately searching him for an answer.

Lloyd touched his forehead to hers and cursed the guard for not unlocking his cuffs before they’d left Maybelle. He looked deep into her eyes, forcing Julianne to fix her gaze upon him. He spoke sternly, near commanding. Lloyd still chose gentle words, hoping to get through to her.

“Juju sweetheart, listen to me now. You need to calm down. Concentrate. Breathe. Come back to me, here and now. Relax. Breathe.”

With Julianne still laying on him he could feel her heart race, pounding like a jack hammer in her chest. Lloyd put extra focus on his own breathing, hoping to help her sync with him. Deep breaths, Inhale and exhale, keeping the rhythm while maintaining eye contact.

Slowly Julianne began to detense, her breathing finding its own beat and her heart slowing to a normal rate. Lloyd felt her muscles untighten and her arms fell limp around his shoulders. She was flustered, almost panting, when she spoke.

“You…” she began, tired from the attack and trying to catch her breath. “Every time… you manage to… fix it… How?”

Lloyd was tempted to break into a technical explanation, as he was accustomed, but knew Julianne wasn’t asking that. 

He smiled instead, finding new words coming easily to him.

“It’s easy when I know it’s what you need and something I can provide for you.”

Julianne caught his smile and the spark that lit up his eyes when he talked. He was a geeky looking man, but she found even that admirable. He was who he was and didn’t ever try to pretend he wasn’t, like most men she’d met.

Lloyd watched her watch him, but not for long. Julianne leaned on her elbow to fix his hair with her left hand, blushing as she did. That was when she felt it. 

The burning in her chest and the rush of heat to her cheeks. The butterflies in her stomach and the desire to be even closer to him.

She didn’t intend it, or even have time to react to herself. She tilted her head ever slightly and pressed her lips to his. It was a gentle kiss, and fairly brief. She released him the second she felt herself start to wonder if it was a good idea. The panic was beginning to return.

Lloyd hadn’t expected it, but was more than thrilled it happened. He knew he was wildly in love with Julianne but never imagined she’d feel even slightly the way he did.   
Lloyd was coming to terms with longing for her, until that moment.

And he wasn’t going to let her get away with letting him go.

Lloyd gave chase to her release, until he couldn’t. They parted lips and Lloyd was desperate for more of her. He pleaded with lust-filled eyes, breathless and nearing   
pain.

“Julianne…”

She heard the cry in his voice as she lightly grazed his cheekbone with the tips of her fingers. Lloyd closed his eyes and leaned into her touch as Julianne worried her   
bottom lip for a moment. She found herself wanting him to touch her back in the worst way.

Lloyd burned for the same thing, cursing the guards in his mind as his heart threatened to burst out his ribcage. He heard Julianne exhale before he felt her lips again.


	16. Sixteen

Ray had been driving for just over an hour before he’d found them. Snow was thick over the ground and he was beginning to find it difficult to push forward. It was the second time he’d been down the deserted highway, and he barely noticed the truck then. But he was glad that he had.

Ray pulled off to the side of the highway when he came upon a large vehicle resting against a tree in the ditch, the truck unrecognizable under the fallen snow. 

He tread with care through the feet of fluff to the vehicle. He carried with him only a flashlight and turned it on once he’d gotten to the truck. It was buried deep in slush, but it slid away at the brush of Ray’s arm. He shined the light into the back seat and was overcome with confusion.

Julianne was on top of Lloyd, the couple attached at the face. Their legs were knotted together and the small girl had one hand fisted in Lloyd’s hair and the other underneath the two of them. Neither one of them took notice of the flashlight or the man standing outside the vehicle. Ray opened the back door.

Julianne sat between Ray and Lloyd in Charlie’s truck. They’d been caught making out in the back of the destroyed SUV and now Ray was furious. He drove with flaring nostrils, steam billowing out his ears. He didn’t know what to think, and Julianne was beginning to worry about it.

She felt the tightness in her chest again and knew the panic was coming. Julianne shifted slightly towards Ray, their shoulders already touching, as her right hand sought the company of Lloyd’s. He leaned forward as Julianne’s hand pushed its way past him and found his own.

Instantly her heart found its natural rhythm and she smiled. Lloyd did too, and for the first time Ray really saw how much they meant to each other.


	17. Seventeen

Julianne was the first to know. It happened so quickly she found herself reacting on instinct. The phone had rung twenty minutes after the Maybelle van left the premises, carrying its cargo back to lock up. Charlie and Ray were heading out the door, already descending in the elevator, and Julianne was just closing down her computer. Had it been two minutes later, they’d of missed everyone.

She ran down the stairs with a tear in her eye, trying to calm herself before she reached Ray and Charlie. Julianne didn’t want to seem too attached.

“Oh.” Was all Charlie could muster.

“What do we do?”

Ray looked to Charlie and waited for him to speak. He didn’t, processing the scenarios. Ray answered the only one he thought was right.

“We’ll have to pick him up. Take him there.” 

“I’ll do it.”

Julianne’s offer caught both of their attentions like magnets attracting each other from a few inches apart. She continued before they had the chance to counteract her   
offer.

“He’s not going to run out on me, like he might either of you and there’s a good chance he’d going to be emotional.”

She knew neither of them had any interest in spending a few days with an emotional and distraught genius. They didn’t argue a word with her and she was in her car within moments.


	18. Eighteen

Julianne arrived at Maybelle half an hour after the van, a miracle by her standards. Charlie had called ahead to make sure Lloyd was waiting when she arrived. They had a 22 hour drive ahead of them and it was already dinner time.

The guard brought Lloyd over, opening the back door of the white Jetta and placing Lloyd in. The big man buckled Lloyd in and Julianne thanked him before pulling out of the drive again.

She held her composure for ten minutes while Lloyd joked about her wanting to spend time with him and people escaping prison on a more frequent basis, and suggested some combination of the two. 

Julianne pulled over on the side of the highway, throwing the 4-way flashers on before getting out of the car. Lloyd was confused as Jules opened his door and unbuckled his seat belt. He became worried when she started to help him out of the vehicle. 

“What’s all this Jules? You’re not going to leave me out on the side of the highway? I’m sorry if I’ve been talking too much. I can quite down.”

Julianne took a small set of keys from her pocket and unlocked the cuffs. Lloyd stood, dumbfounded as Julianne closed the door to his former seat and opened the one   
leading to the front of the vehicle, allowing Lloyd to sit in the passenger seat restrained by nothing more than his seat belt.

He moved to the shotgun chair, closed the door and buckled himself up as Julianne did hers. He was silent and still until Julianne took an exit leading them into Pennsylvania.

“Jules?” he asked, his voice now laced with concern and worry.

“It’s your mom Lloyd. She passed.”


	19. Nineteen

Lloyd was quiet for quite some time, reflecting on what Jules had told him. He kept his head against the window, his eyes on the scenery.

Julianne repeatedly glanced over, to check on him, but all she could see was the side of his head. Jules continued to drive in silence, concentrating on the highway and   
their rest stop destination.

Lloyd didn’t speak for almost five hours. 

Julianne had pulled into the motel and parked the car. She asked Lloyd if he wanted to check in with her in a tentative voice. She had prepared for his no and wasn’t   
shocked when he shook his head. Julianne was thankful for Ray calling ahead. She still had a hard time talking with strangers and knew she couldn’t rely on Lloyd to do it for   
her this time. She wasn’t away from the Jetta for more than a few minutes, but it was enough time for Lloyd to think. She spoke the moment Julianne opened the door and   
reclaimed her seat.

“I don’t have a change of clothes.”

Julianne looked to him. He still hadn’t moved. Lloyd continued to stare at the pavement marked for the room next to theirs. She answered his question as simply as she   
could.

“I took care of it.”

“Are you sure?”

She could hear the pain in his voice, the question he was really asking. Lloyd wasn’t worried about clothes.

“I’m sure.”

Lloyd accepted her answer and instantly his demeanor changed. He opened his door and exited the car, causing Julianne to do the same. She popped the trunk and Lloyd   
beat her there, removing the two suitcases from the space and closing the lid again before Julianne knew what was happening. She was at a slight loss of words as Lloyd   
picked up on it and let slip a small smile. The drastic change in character was confusing and scaring her. She didn’t have anything to say, but she didn’t want the new mood to   
lull back into the old one. She spoke with her gut.

“I was thinking pizza?” she suggested slowly as Lloyd’s eye lit up.

“Chicago style?”

“If that’s what you want.”

Lloyd started wheeling the bags to the door they’d parked in front of. Julianne followed behind him with the key and unlocked it as he answered her back.

“Only if that’s what you want.”

She agreed, though it didn’t bother her what they ordered. Lloyd put the bags down at the foot of each bed, his closest the window. She smiled at his gesture,   
remembering a conversation they’d had in passing nearly a year ago.

Lloyd found the remote for the small screen and promptly discovered a two year old episode of Doctor Who airing while Julianne called for their late dinner.

They sat and watched in silence, Lloyd fixated on the 4th dimentionalism of the show and Julianne marveled at the gorgeousness that the Doctor exuded.

It was quiet again until the pizza arrived.


	20. Twenty

Julianne and Lloyd ate in the spots they rested in. Lloyd made half efforts at conversation, explaining the logistics and probabilities of 4th dimensions between slices of thick deep dish from Pete Zeria’s Pizza.

He smiled and laughed and put on a show. And though Julianne was laughing along with him, even he felt she was doing it just to keep him from breaking down. He   
needed to keep the energy flowing if he was going to make it through the night.

Lloyd fought over taking advantage of the bath or not and didn’t argue with himself too much when he decided it was a good idea. He missed having a tub and took   
advantage of them whenever one crossed his path. He promised Jules, and himself, that he’d be quick. The longer he was without someone to put a show on for the quicker   
he’d be a disaster.

Julianne was surprised to find Lloyd returned before the hot water ran out. He was clean, smelling of single-use Irish Spring. His night clothes consisted of a thin pair of   
light grey sweatpants and a white Hanes tag less t-shirt.

She knew what he’d be wearing. She bought and packed the clothes herself. She was just caught off guard. She never expected he’d look as good as he did in them.

Julianne pulled her mind out of the gutter as Lloyd spoke.

“Thanks Jules. For new threads.”

Lloyd’s smile was weak and forced. He smoothed his shirt down the side of his stomach, just to feel the fabric on the palm of his hand. 

Julianne felt a tenseness in her chest, but it wasn’t the onslaught of an attack. She could tell it was hard on him, but he was putting up a decent act. Whether it was for his   
or her benefit she couldn’t tell. But she was genuinely feeling pain for him. A sort of burning in her stomach that began to rise through her until-

“Oh no.”

Julianne bolted for the bathroom, nearly tripping over her bag to get there. She almost didn’t make it to the toilet before she was losing her dinner. Turned out the   
Chicago style pizza didn’t like her as much as she had liked it.

Lloyd could hear her on the other side of the door, which she still managed to kick closed before she started to heave. He waited for her there, not saying anything to   
bring more attention to the fact that she was being sick. He waited until it was quiet again before speaking.

“You alright Jules?” he asked the door frame.

She made a sound of embarrassment before she flushed. Julianne felt worse after the fact that she did before hand. She knew Lloyd had stood just outside the door   
listening. She also knew that had she left the door open he’d of followed her in to make sure she was alright. There wasn’t much she could do now that it had all transpired.   
Julianne rose from the bathroom floor and opened the door.

Lloyd stepped back a foot to give her room. She went right to her bag and moved in the direction of which she came.

“I’m okay. Going to have a shower now though. Thanks Lloyd.”

Once again she closed the door, trapping herself on the other side of it. Lloyd had wanted to say something, but was cut off with the sound of the lock sliding. Julianne   
obviously didn’t want to deal with the situation, the embarrassment she felt. Lloyd let it go and slid into him bed. 

The clock read ten after eleven when Julianne finally left the bathroom. Her hour long shower was almost enough to wash the humiliation from her face. She left the   
small, steamed up space to find the lights and television off and Lloyd asleep under the covers.

Julianne crept through the dark room, the dim light from the bathroom her only source of illumination. She found her way to the twin bed easily, slipping in and covering   
her lace camisole and matching shorts with the slightly scratchy sheets. She turned onto her left side to face Lloyd, who had his back to her.

And with purpose, because it was then that he broke down.


	21. Twenty One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is where it gets an M rating

The emotions Lloyd had first felt when Julianne told him started to seep out. The pain, the hurt, the sadness, the anger… everything he had bottled up had come uncorked and he couldn’t control it. Once the lights were off and the dark silence filled the room the sadness flooded him. 

Lloyd had once loved his mother. When he was younger, and in school and working towards being a psychologist. That was when he mother loved him in return. When his gambling became a problem and other issued started to arise was when she started to turn her back on him, her only son. 

Agnes stopped returning his phone calls, his cries for help. She showed him to tough love her parents had showed her. And when Lloyd was arrested and sentenced to life in lock up she cut him out completely. Lloyd had often called her from prison, trying to make amends and win his mother back, but she wasn’t having any of it. Lloyd knew he’d disappointed his mother, but she was all he had.

And now she was gone.

Lloyd cried quietly to himself for nearly an hour, curled up under the blankets of the motel bed. Julianne had exited the shower and he tried to calm down, but it didn’t   
work too well. Luckily she didn’t turn on any lights. Lloyd didn’t want to be seen in such a way. He truly did love Julianne, but their moments together never surpassed a level of comfort that tested the friendship barrier. Now that his mother was gone Lloyd was completely alone in the world. He felt he needed Julianne more than ever.

She watched him from her own bed, tangled into himself under the sheets shaking gently. Jules imagined he was upset and crying, but she also assumed from his   
position that he didn’t want to be bothered. Her heart reached for him all the same. She wanted to be next to him, telling him he wasn’t alone and that she’d help him through all of it, help him with anything he wanted or needed. But the moment wasn’t right yet. Lloyd would need his space as much as he would need the comfort. So Julianne waited.

Lloyd thought about how he never had a real chance to reconcile with his mother. He wanted to show her how working with the team was getting him closer to having his life back, but Agnes never wanted to hear about it. Every time he tried to explain to her, she came back at him with a comment about how he could have been so much more. It was in that moment he recalled that was the last thing she’d said to him.

The grief became too much for him to handle in that moment. Lloyd began to shake with tears, a cry to intense it frightened Julianne at first. He’d finally broken, but he’d broke hard. Unable to watch from a distance, Julianne left her bed and took the two steps to Lloyd’s. She slipped in next to him and he turned to face her. Julianne held him as he cried into her chest. He sobbed quietly and Julianne cried for him, rubbing his back as she did. 

She didn’t speak, and neither did he. Not for quite some time. Once Julianne had stopped herself from weeping on his behalf she kissed the top of his head and spoke.

“My father died when I was fifteen. It was really tough on me and I never got over it. Believe me when I say it never gets better, but it does get easier.”

Lloyd didn’t know a thing about Julianne’s father until that moment. It took a lot of courage for her to share anything about her family. She once told Lloyd that she didn’t   
trust any of the crew enough to tell them anything about herself. Now she was sharing with him.

He started to calm down, concentrating on his breathing for once, and managed to stop crying long enough to sort through his head. He had so much he wanted to say   
to Julianne. So much to thank her for, so much he wanted to express. For once he was speechless.

Julianne kissed the top of his head in the silence that followed. She cleared the tears from his cheeks with the pad of her thumb, brushing it across his puffy red face. She   
kissed his forehead as he closed his eyes once more, reveling in her closeness.

Moonlight trickled in through the slit of the nearly closed curtain, giving the room a blue-silver glow. Lloyd opened his eyes to feast on Julianne’s illuminated cream-  
colored skin. He ran his hand down her arm, the silk feeling sending a shiver down his spine.

Julianne exhaled heavily, her arm tingling in the wake of Lloyd’s fingers. She ran her teeth over her bottom lip, worrying herself some. She breathed in the scent of Irish   
Spring and tears as Lloyd looked up to her.

He ran his hand up the back of her thin pink tank, pulling her closer to him and him closer to her, until they were pressed gently together. Lloyd looked up to her lips, full   
and palely lit by the moonlight. He couldn’t resist them, and he moved in to meet them with his.

The kiss started tender and kind, her soft lips parting slightly as she moved ever closer to him. Lloyd ran his other hand across her back and down over her ass, grabbing   
it and pulling her onto him as he rolled to his back. Julianne’s tongue pushed past Lloyd’s lips first, finding his instantly. They played together in a pool of saliva.

Lloyd’s had both hands up the back of her top, caressing the soft skin of her body as they made their way around her hips and over her stomach. She was fit but lacked   
the muscular definition that would have turned him off instantly. He ran his hands over her belly, thumbs trailing, until they found her breasts. Lloyd flicked her already hard   
nipples with his thumbs before she had time to remove her shirt completely.

He stopped to just gaze upon them, the soft, silky cream-white breasts they looked back at him. They fit perfectly in his hands, as if they were made for him and him only. Julianne bucked her hips, encouraging Lloyd to act soon. He sat half way up, enough to grab hold of Julianne once more, and moved the pair of them so she was pinning   
beneath him. Lloyd grabbed her breasts, fisting them in his hands, and leaned in. He licked her right nipple, then the left, before going back to the first. He ran his tongue   
over them once or twice, getting each wet and ready. He ran his teeth other the left, then the right as Julianne worked an arm over his chubby tummy, sliding in through the   
elastic waistband, until it found his already fully erect cock.

As sweet and innocent as Julianne appeared to all that knew her, she was the complete opposite when it came to sex. She liked it rough, sometimes bordering violent.   
She was willing to give Lloyd whatever he needed, but showing him how far he could take it might help him discover what that was.

She gripped the shaft tight, squeezing enough to cause Lloyd to want to pull away. She pressed her thumb along the underside as she stroked, tracing the vein. She   
gently scraped her nail over the head, pulling at the exposed skin and sending an intense shock through Lloyd’s gut and into his spine. 

Lloyd took her breast in his mouth again, swiping his tongue against her right nipple hard, teeth closing in on it. He bit the protruding nub, causing Julianne’s hand to   
tighten slightly around his dick.

His lips found hers again and their tongues met instantly, fighting each other for contact. Lloyd twisted her nipple between his thumb and forefinger, pulling on it until it   
slipped from his grasp while she fought to get his shirt off.

Lloyd helped, ripping the Hanes from his torso before removing his pants as well. He freed Julianne of her shorts, popping some of the stitching along the left side as he   
tore at them, revealing her light pink lace thong.

He put the pink lace out of his mind as his hand rubbed her clit and their lips met a third time. Unlike before it was gentle and loving, Lloyd setting the pace and making   
the moment last. He pulled at her lip when he parted. He trailed southward, leaving light kisses in his wake. One under her chin, one between her breasts, one on her   
stomach, and one on her navel, until he’d met with the lace once more.

Lloyd gripped the thong with his teeth, scraping Julianne’s tender skin as he did, and pulled them off without his hands. Julianne smiled at his efforts as he returned to   
her, his eyes burning a hole through her soul.

He met her gaze, both their eyes glossed over with lust, their noses almost touching. She reached out to touch him, to run her hand over his chest, but he stopped her,   
taking her wrist in his hand and placing it behind her head.

“No touching.”

She was baffled for a second as he stared into her eyes. There was some determination in his stare. Lloyd had a plan, and he wanted her to play along. Julianne smiled,   
and repeated his words back to him in compliance. She moved her left hand to meet her right as Lloyd’s right hand found her clit again.

She closed her eyes as he pinched it, gently pulling at the nub. Lloyd used his free hand to position her head facing him again and she opened her eyes.

“Don’t look away.”

His voice was commanding and gentle at the same time. She didn’t say anything, but kept her eyes opened and focused on his as Lloyd went back to work. He rubbed her   
clit while she kept focus, biting her lip to keep from closing her eyes.

Once Julianne had overcome to urge to give into her senses, Lloyd added two fingers to the mix, pushing into her tight box in one, violent go.

Julianne made a sound Lloyd had never heard before. Something between a whimper and a yelp. The noise combined with the lightning that shot through her brown   
eyes nearly sent Lloyd directly into orgasm. He locked the sound away in his mind, alongside the lace thong, in case he never heard it again.

Lloyd worked his fingers, slowly at first, in and out with a gentle gliding rhythm as he rubbed her clit with his thumb. She bucked her hips a few times, chewing on her lip   
to the point of bleeding while keeping her promise of eyes contact. 

He stepped up the pace, curling his fingers upward as he pushed them in harder. She fought to keep her eyes open, barely winning the battle. She pushed back on him, a   
pained hum seeping from her throat as her muscles started to clench tighter around his fingers.

His name escaped her lips, drifting like fog into the atmosphere as she came. Her eyes closed on reflex when her head went back, her muscles contracting hard around   
his fingers as her legs quivered. Her body shook for a few seconds before she could begin to recover.

Lloyd pressed his lips to hers again, forcing his tongue between them. He wiped his hand discreetly along the edge of the bed before Julianne caught him, wrapping her   
knees around his hips and flipping him over onto his back once more.

She parted from his lips, moving to hover over his ear, whispering hot towards him. She spoke one word and one word only. It was something he’d never heard from her   
lips in any context, and this night she spoke it with burning passion and long awaited desire. One word.

“Fuck.”

Julianne took his face in her hands and kissing him as though she were on fire, burning to be a part of him. Their tongued mashed together, exploring each other   
mouths as she ran her hands over his throat and across his chest to his nipples. She pinched them hard, twisting and pulling until they were purple between her fingers.   
Lloyd cried out, their lips parting once more. 

She rose above him, still resting on her knees as she grasped his cock in her left hand. She stroked it a few more times, Lloyd’s head lulling back against the flat pillows.   
She positioned him to enter and let her knees drift apart, sliding down onto him until what little weight she had rested on his hips. Lloyd cried out an Oh God as Julianne   
rolled her hips. His hands found them and gripped them tight, Julianne putting her tiny fingers over his as he guided her to a rhythm he wanted. She complied, their hands   
remaining put.

Julianne rocked and bounced, his shaft working in and out of her, the head of his penis just nudging her cervix when she pounded down. She looked down onto him to   
see he was enjoying it as much as she was.

She moved his hands around to her ass as she grinded on him. His breathing turned erratic as he gripped her rounded cheeks, pulling them apart as he squeezed the   
flesh in his hands. She started to bounce on him again, rocking back as she pulled up, clenching her muscles as she did.

Julianne closed her eyes when Lloyd muttered the Fuck back to her, digging his fingers into her backside as she pulled up. He opened his eyes long enough to watch her tits bounce up and down as she did. Julianne ran her hands up over the back of her head, pulling her long blonde hair up with it, fanning it out for him before he closed his   
eyes and started to pound her back, bucking his hips like a wild stallion.

Lloyd called out to her in her candy nickname as he came, adding a fuck to it when she let herself go for the second time that night half a moment later. She drew every last drop from him, Lloyd bucking with a quiver a few last times while Julianne rocked slowly against his hips before collapsing down next to him.

The pair was spent, Lloyd having only been with a woman twice before (and not once in the last ten years of his life) and Julianne having been abstinent since her last   
boyfriend debacle a year before she joined the team.

Lloyd pulled Julianne in close, wrapping an arm around her she as she cuddled into his side, tangling one leg in between his two. He ran his hand through her sweat   
dampened hair, kissing any bit of her he could reach. She brushed the tip of her nose between his slightly defined peck muscles, rubbing the slight dip that separated them.

Both of their breathing had quickened, but Julianne started to fade into a normal pace as her heart started to beat regular again. Her eyes began to draw heavy and she   
fought to keep them open.

Lloyd noticed it and pulled the thin scratchy sheet over her up to her shoulders, chanting in a soothing matter.  
“Sleep my JuJube. Get some rest.”

They stayed awake together for eight more minutes, Julianne saying the words first before she dozed off.

“I love you Lloyd Lowery.”

Lloyd smiled as he fought back the tears. She meant it in every context, and he was more than privileged to have even a small place in her heart. He spoke honestly, for the first time, the words he’d told himself since the first day he went to work for the Marshals.

“I love you too Julianne Simms. Always.”


End file.
